Life's Crossroads

Here I am, new place and new start, it is a great opportunity to serve at a ministry this summer and scope out plans for the future. I am grateful and from a human perspective it is a logical step. It’s just for summer, but my heart pulls evermore to take me from the comfortable suburbs. All I know is I long more than ever to be inner-city now.

My prayer is for my next step. All I ask is that the Lord gives me initiative to step out the moment He reveals it. I’m not asking for a full-blown roadmap, but just enough light for me to know where to set my foot. If it is for me to be here for the next couple months I ask for peace, but my honest heart is seeking new direction today.

I know my passions don’t always scream practical. I know they are real though and they are impossible to deny. As these thoughts remain unsettled in my mind I have continued to spend quiet time reading God’s word and books full of wisdom. I have had peace from the start that God won’t direct me where He won’t provide my needs.

My Bible reading yesterday reminded me, “You know with all your heart and soul that not one of all the good promises the Lord your God gave you has failed. Every promise has been fulfilled; not one has failed.” (Joshua 23:14b, NIV) One may overlook the connection, but a few months ago as I trying to make ends of my longings I couldn’t help to think of Abraham. At that point I began reading His story again. God didn’t reveal His plan He just called Abraham to leave. I knew I needed to lay down my current responsibilities so I could move forward. I knew God was in a worship time I attended when that point of Abraham’s life was highlighted. I could continue through the Bible story through the end of Joshua’s life that I just finished reading to parallel my current path.

My other reading has been David Jeremiah’s book, Life Wide Open. Exactly, what I need to be reading right now. It’s all about passionate living. He printed a quote from Enrique Camarena that matches me heart, “I can’t not do this. I’m only one person, but I want to make a difference.”

Maybe God’s will is for me to stay here throughout the summer before He opens doors for me or maybe the step that got me here was just a necessary part of letting go and grasping motivation to take a bigger step. Right now my hope is tied to the second.

I analyze everything. It’s what I do. I could argue perspectives from either side of the coin within my head until I go crazy. If there is one thing I’ve been coming to the realization of it is that I don’t always need to understand my circumstances. I just need to have faith to continue following the path. I must say, as a human, it’s so hard.